Craft Corner

(this blog has really opened my eyes to how much I absolutely adore alliterations)

TGFW (Thank God For Wine)... because we can't say TGIF everyday.

Making baked mac&cheese... set the timer... 30 mins later, timer goes off and I realize I forgot to turn on the oven. TGFW.

I think my students replaced themselves with demon clones today. TGFW.

The dog took a massive shit in the kitchen and the boyfriend threw up on my sandals. In the same 5 minutes. TGFW.

Mistook Wednesday for Friday. TGFW.

"Wine is proof God loves us and wants us to be happy." -Benjamin Franklin

Current Obsessions

7/3/13
THIS:

2/3/13

Beyonce and curry sauce.

Beyonce: After I finished watching the HBO Beyonce special, I swear I allllllllllmost started watching it from the beginning right then and there. But I didn't. #selfcontrol.

Curry sauce: I had a (very stupid) preconceived notion that I didn't like curry sauce. But while out for my boyfriend's bday dinner, he was going on and on about curry sauce, so I thought, why not?! and gave it a whirl. I now want to put curry sauce on every single food I eat. But I don't. #selfcontrol.

1/5/13 (Happy New Year!)
Candles! I was never one of those girls who loved going into Bath & Body Works to get seasonally scented candles. But now I am. And I don't know how it happened. But it's okay because now my apartment smells of cinnamon, oranges and leaves.

10/13/12
YELPING!!! Yes, I have always used Yelp to research anything and everything. But for the first time, I started writing reviews.. and I can't stop! And I have been racking my brain all day trying to think of more places I can Yelp about.

5/6/12
Sons of Anarchy. I didn't think I'd like a show about an outlaw motorcycle club (then again, I do love me a Gangland marathon) but I do. And I just wanna shout it from the rooftops!!! No really, I like a show about an outlaw motorcycle club... can't ya tell?

4/21/12
OATMEAL! OATMEAL! OATMEAL! Let me begin by saying, I eat oatmeal for breakfast every. single. morning. You may be thinking, "What a bore." But there is SO much you can do with oatmeal! (okay, now I sound like an oatmeal nerd. point taken) And my latest oatmeal obsession comes from my girl, Giada de Laurentiis. She suggested (YES, personally suggested to ME... and everyone else watching the Today Show) to put a little extra virgin olive oil and sea salt on oatmeal... so yeah, before you go and judge my breakfast as boring, try for yourself a bowl of this exquisite goodness.

4/5/12
LANA DEL REY. If you haven't listened to any of Born to Die, your life is far from complete. AND whiskey pickle shots... so go have yourself some shots and listen to Born to Die. You're welcome.

2/6/12
Seaweed Salad!!!

2/1/12
Tea, Citizen Cope

On a side note... anytime I drink tea and leave the tea bag in the cup (I know, I know you’re not supposed to do that) my precious pup comes out of nowhere & swiftly pulls the tea bag out of the cup. Perhaps he is English and trying to rid me of my tea faux pas.....

Questionable Things My Boyfriend Says

Me: I read today hot dogs have pig buttholes in them.
Him: Sure, they have everything in them.

Him: Spell taco cat backwards.
Me: ...... wait it's gonna be the same forwards and backwards.
Him: Yeah that's pretty awesome!
Me: But what's a taco cat?
Him: I don't know but it's cool that you can spell it forwards and backwards the same way.
Me: TACO CATS DON'T EXIST!!!

"This is my dream I'm gonna put my nest egg." (and no, there was no further explanation of his "dream" or "nest egg")

"YES! Amish Mafia is on next!"

During family game night, "Why do these pieces look like awkward wieners?"

"I have a thing for elves recently."

"You know how I feel about pans that can't handle omelets.. PRESENTATION IS EVERYTHING!"

"The drive from Tucson to Phoenix is so monogamous." (did you mean, monotonous?)

"I wanted to get out of something, so I told the guys my girlfriend would be pissed if I wasn't at home to help her hand out candy to the trick or treaters."

Him: I need some *makes squeaking noise & rubbing motion with his hand*
Me: Some what?
Him: *Squeaking noise & rubbing motion with his hand*
Me: WHAT?
...I realize he's holding a razor...
Me: Shaving cream?
Him: Mhmmm

Regarding fantasy football- "My fantasy life sucks. My fantasy life is over."

"It's the picture where you're wearing the princess helmet." Princess helmet=tiara. And it was my 21st bday, so cut me some slack.

"What do your eyebrows look like when they're not perfectly perfect? Chewbacca?"

"Get those reheats started!" (instead of calling them “leftovers,” he called them “reheats.” Do people actually say that?! ...as if you could make leftovers sound anymore unappealing.)

"I finally understand how I got this little belly... I've been eating way too much."

"Laundry is easy, just set it and forget it."

"We should move to a place where sunshine isn't so common."

RELATED: Questionable Things My Boyfriend Does

This is how he "changes" the tp every. single. time.

I recently found out the BF has an addiction (although I'm sure he wouldn't appreciate me describing it that way) to cheese sticks. Sure, there are worse things one could be addicted to, I only wish he would become addicted to getting the wrappers in the trashcan. I find them everywhere BUT the trashcan. i.e., this is what I came home to the other day:

Dude. You were so  close.